Murphy's Line Law

If there's a choice of lines, you will choose the one that moves the slowest.

Ok, so this isn't an actual law, but you KNOW it should be! I am the proof that this is true. No matter where I am, I always seem to choose the slowest line. I can be at the grocery store and choose the line with only one person in front of me. That person is guaranteed to: 1) have coupons that don't scan, 2) have an argument about the price of an item, 3) write a check, 4) have a pen that's out of ink, 5) lose the glasses they need to see the check they are writing, etc.

Even more proof is rush hour traffic. I try to be a fairly patient driver when I'm stuck in stop-and-go traffic. I talk to myself and make up tuneless songs about the happenings around me. (Today's songs included asking people to speed up but not go too fast in the rain as I would only end up going slower if they were in an accident... I know, it was a classic song.) I also try to pick a lane and stick with it for most of the drive. The problem is, I never pick the right one. If I'm in the middle lane, the lane on my left will be going faster. If I'm in the second to left lane, the second to right lane will be trucking along.

It would seem that then all I'd have to do is get in that one lane that's moving. Except that doesn't work. If I decide to change lanes, then so do about 50 other people and the lane stops moving. I keep telling myself that it's better to be patient and stay in one lane rather than move about... But it doesn't really seem to matter what I do.

Other people may enter the interstate at the same on ramp as me and go the same distance, but they get there in 3/4 the time it takes me because they apparently are not governed by Murphy's Line Law.