Murphy's Line Law

If there's a choice of lines, you will choose the one that moves the slowest.

Ok, so this isn't an actual law, but you KNOW it should be! I am the proof that this is true. No matter where I am, I always seem to choose the slowest line. I can be at the grocery store and choose the line with only one person in front of me. That person is guaranteed to: 1) have coupons that don't scan, 2) have an argument about the price of an item, 3) write a check, 4) have a pen that's out of ink, 5) lose the glasses they need to see the check they are writing, etc.

Even more proof is rush hour traffic. I try to be a fairly patient driver when I'm stuck in stop-and-go traffic. I talk to myself and make up tuneless songs about the happenings around me. (Today's songs included asking people to speed up but not go too fast in the rain as I would only end up going slower if they were in an accident... I know, it was a classic song.) I also try to pick a lane and stick with it for most of the drive. The problem is, I never pick the right one. If I'm in the middle lane, the lane on my left will be going faster. If I'm in the second to left lane, the second to right lane will be trucking along.

It would seem that then all I'd have to do is get in that one lane that's moving. Except that doesn't work. If I decide to change lanes, then so do about 50 other people and the lane stops moving. I keep telling myself that it's better to be patient and stay in one lane rather than move about... But it doesn't really seem to matter what I do.

Other people may enter the interstate at the same on ramp as me and go the same distance, but they get there in 3/4 the time it takes me because they apparently are not governed by Murphy's Line Law.

Book Report: Shel Silverstein

Enter This Desserted House
But please walk softly as you do.
Frogs dwell here and crickets too.
Ain't no ceiling, only blue
Jays dwell here and sunbeams too.
Floors are flowers- take a few.
Ferns grow here and daisies too.
Whoosh, swoosh-- too-whit, too-woo,
Bats dwell here and hoot owls too.
Ha-ha-ha, hee-hee, hoo-hoooo,
Gnomes dwell here and goblins too.
And my child, I thought you knew
I dwell here... and so do you.
---Shel Silverstein from "Where the Sidewalk Ends"

I'm going to deviate a little from my original plan and report on an author today. I don't know how often I'll do this, but there are some authors who are worth it. Shel Silverstein is one of them.

Growing up, we often checked "Where the Sidewalk Ends" and "A Light in the Attic" out of the library. At one point, my mom discovered them on tape and she would get them so we could listen to Mr. Silverstein read, sing and chant his poems. We learned many of his poems by heart and I'm fairly certain that most of us can still quote a few... Especially one poem in particular about spitting off a building. We learned how to get out of drying dishes, how to stay friends forever, what happens if you watch TV too long and what could happen if your parents refuse to buy you a pony. We learned what would happen if you ate too much peanut butter, excuses for being late to school, proper babysitting techniques and so much more.

In all the humor- and there is a lot- there are also a few real life lessons. I try to remember some of his more inspirational poems when I'm having a hard time with life. One of my favorites:

Listen to the Mustn'ts

Listen to the MUSTN'TS, child,
Listen to the DON'TS
Listen to the SHOULDN'TS
The IMPOSSIBLES, the WON'TS
Listen to the NEVER HAVES
Then listen close to me-
Anything can happen, child,
ANYTHING can be.
---Shel Silverstein from "Where the Sidewalk Ends"

I only own a couple of his books but believe me, they are worth owning! At the very least, check them out of the library and read them to yourself, to your children, to your spouse, sibling, random people on the street... Share the wealth of smiles and giggles that are the poems of Shel Silverstein.

Oh, and if you do read them to your children, don't blame me if they learn a thing or two about Backwards Bill, Blackbeard's Beard and Ickle Me, Pickle Me, Tickle Me Too. On the other hand, you may be lucky and they may learn about giving from a tree and about the similarities between little boys and old men. I think it's worth the risk.

Wishing I Could Give Good News

Two weeks from today my little sister will be getting married and I will be in UT. I was really hoping for some good news to announce today, but it's not to be.

Branden's interview... Well... The job wasn't what it was represented as being. Honestly, I feel like screaming and crying right now. Basically, it's another contract-work job BUT they want us to fork out at least $500 to start AND buy a truck. Umm... We don't have $50 to pay for him to get hired somewhere, much less $500! It's also a little frustrating to me that Branden is still thinking there may be a way for him to do this. What part of we have no money and can't afford a truck does he not understand? I have to stop thinking about this or I really will bawl. Can't we just catch a break?

We Could Use Some Good Thoughts and Positive Energy

Branden has a job interview on Thursday. The job is internet installation for Charter Communications. It's a real job and I am DESPERATE for him to get it. We need something good like this or I honestly don't know how we're going to fix and register my car in December, much less celebrate anything or save any money for our wedding. There's nothing I can really do to make them hire him, but he's more than qualified so there's hope- assuming that there aren't any more people with master's degrees going up against him. I'm trying not to hope too much but... There's a piece of me that can't help but hope that this is finally the job.

"Nature's Finest Green Is Gold"

So far, autumn out here has been beautiful. The leaves started changing a week or so ago and they're not done yet. I love seeing the new colors every day on the way home from work. :) Today is clear and the air has the perfect crispness without actually being chilly. It has been raining a bit over the last week-ish but even an overcast day feels like a lovely autumn day to me.

It's so nice to get to enjoy this weather without wondering if it's going to snow tomorrow. I've only had to scrape the frost off my windshield once so far. I know I'll get plenty of chances in the future, but it's the fact that it hasn't snowed and we really haven't had a true hard frost yet that matters most to me now.

I have a lot of thoughts in my head right now- some of them happy, some of them more whiny- but all I really want to write about is the weather and the colors. I could only wish for something as pretty as this for our wedding... Which probably won't happen, but that's a more whiny thought so I'm going to attempt to suppress it. Maybe I can convince Branden to go for a drive today and we can take some pictures for me to share. :)

I'll be in UT on November 5th for Chantelle's wedding. I'm really looking forward to spending time with some family and friends. :) I may not be back before my own wedding so I'm going to do my best to enjoy every moment.

By the by, the title of my blog is from Robert Frost's poem "Nothing Gold Can Stay." It's only eight lines long, so look it up and read it all. It's a little sad (it was written while Frost was grieving the loss of friends), but when I think about it I remember that the gold of autumn only lasts a little while and I should appreciate it while I can.

Clean Bathroom... If Only For a Day Or So

Today I cleaned our bathroom... REALLY cleaned it. I took over an hour to scrub every surface, dump out, clean and re-fill the litter box and get all the litter off the floor, tub and toilet.

Maybe I should explain that we have been using a flush-able wheat cat litter. I'm not positive, but I seriously believe it's just cracked wheat. It's kinda nice to scoop litter straight into the toilet but for some reason it's also far messier than regular scoopable litter. It's quite dusty but there's more... It just gets everywhere. On the other hand, because it's wheat it's not all that hard to clean up.

Anyway, it's not as if we don't ever clean the bathroom but, what with our being sick and all, it had been a while and it was time for a deep cleaning. I honestly can't believe how good it looks. You know when things get left on the counter and the mess slowly builds up but you don't think much of it because it's not like it's gross, it's just cluttered? Maybe you don't. Maybe we're messier than most people. The point is, when it's gotten bad and you get all that stuff off the counter and put away, and everything that belongs on the counter is wiped down and placed properly, and the counter itself has been cleaned... It's amazing. And seeing the tub and toilet free of dust and hair of all forms is pretty nice, too.

I even went to the extent of cleaning up the bathroom closet. The towels are nice and neat again. The band-aids, decongestant and cold medicine are back in their respective boxes and placed on the proper shelves. Even the lightbulbs are lined up neatly. It feels so good to look at all that clean. :)

One complaint that I have about Branden's cleaning style is that he thinks if there's not stuff on the floor then the room is clean. So he'll pick stuff up and set it on a book shelf- or put it in a closet- and even if that thing doesn't go there, he'll call it clean because there's nothing on the floor. If you ever visited us before we moved, you may have noticed this. Needless to say, there was a lot of stuff in that closet that didn't belong there. While I was at it, I made a trip into the living room and kitchen to find things that DID belong in the closet and were set in various places when Branden "cleaned." I've threatened Branden

It's true that I only deep cleaned one room today, but it was probably the most important room to deep clean in terms of germs. The second most important would be the kitchen. Our kitchen stays fairly clean since we have a dishwasher now and can load most dishes right into it. I wipe down the stove and counters with Clorox wipes- I love those things- and the garbage is removed regularly. While it probably is due for a deep clean, I feel mostly good about the kitchen at this time.

Umbrella Thoughts

I don't own an umbrella. Most of the time, this doesn't bother me. I hardly even notice! Yeah, it's been raining quite a bit out here and it was sprinkling off and on today but I rarely feel like I need an umbrella. In my (probably flawed) experience, when it's raining hard enough for me to need something like an umbrella then I'll generally get more wet from water splashing up from the ground than from the water coming down on me. Anyway, what does it matter if I get wet? My clothes are nothing special, I almost never wear make-up and my pigtails are hardly a hairdo worth worrying about... So what if I get wet?

I suppose that it's a good thing that I don't have an umbrella. It'd just be something that I'd have to haul around. I get frustrated when I have to carry around a lot of things I don't need. (What am I going to do when I have kids and have to haul around things for just-in-case?) I don't even like to drag a jacket around with me when there's a chance I may need it.

Oddly enough, this was what I was thinking about on the way home from work today. I would bet money that I was the only person sitting in rush hour traffic and thinking umbrella thoughts.

New "Book Report" Segment!

I have always loved to read. I cherish the memories of sitting next to my mom while she read to me and my siblings. I remember reading books by the glow of the night light when I was supposed to be sleeping... I also remember getting caught and being in trouble for doing so. Books are an escape when I need a quiet moment in my life or a way to pass a lonely evening when everyone else seems to be busy. There are funny stories and ones that make me cry, books that always bring a smile and ones that aren't worth reading again, passages to be shared and others to be kept close to the heart in hard times.

With this in mind, I've decided to do a semi-regular segment reporting on books I read as a young person... Yes, children's books. You may be asking, "Why books for children? Surely you read good books now."

Well, I feel that I've never really "graduated" to adult books. Oh, sure, I read books with chapters now but I often get them from the young adult, teen and sometimes even the children's section. (Harry Potter is for adults, too!) Not to mention the fact that I've always enjoyed reading aloud and most of my reading to others has centered around me reading to small children. Basically, I have fond memories- and sometimes strange memories- of these stories and I will now share them with you. :) With no further ado, I present my first "book report" on Is Your Mama A Llama? By Deborah Guarino, Illustrated by Steven Kellogg.

" Is your mama a llama," I asked my friend Dave.
"No she is not," is the answer Dave gave. "She hangs by her feet and she lives in a cave. I don't believe that's the way llamas behave."
"No," I agreed, "You are right about that. I think your mama must be a bat!"

Maybe it's the rhyming, maybe it's just the many, many times I read this book to my younger siblings and Sabre, but I can quote a good portion of this book by heart. Maybe I don't get all the words quite right, but it'd be close enough that no small child would notice. :) The premise is very simple: A young llama goes to all of his friends and asks if their mama is a llama. Each replies with a description of their mother to explain why she is not a llama until he reaches his friend who is also a llama and asks her. At that point she comfirms that her mother is a llama and that his mother is a llama, too.

This is a book I plan to own when I have children. It lends itself wonderfully to reading out loud and also has classic Steven Kellogg pictures to keep a child's attention. Also, there aren't a lot of words on each page so over-eager listeners don't have to stare at one picture too long. I highly recommend you pick this book up at the library the next time you make a trip there... Seriously, pick it up and read through it even if you don't have any kids.

Branden Gave Me His "Swine Cold"

I got home from work today around 4:50PM. By 5:10PM I was in bed taking a nap and Branden was next to me reading. At some point he fell asleep as well. We slept until 7:50PM. I am still tired and will very likely be going to bed in little over an hour.

If I didn't mention it before, I have Branden's cold. I don't know if I haven't hit the bad point yet, if I have a milder version or if he's just a really big wimp. I do know that I'm exhausted after eight hours of work and today my head hurt all day today. It turns out that a big part of that headache was lack of food. Branden had the WONDERFUL idea for us to use some of the really good Arby's coupons we got in the mail to get dinner. I didn't get lunch today and the caffeine from my Mt. Dew and the curly fries really helped my headache.

I'm starting to think I should be wrapped in bubble wrap and kept at home. Maybe it's because I'm more tired than usual, but I seem to be extra clumsy. I have a large bruise on my right forearm from a box falling on it in the freezer. I have a bruise on my left knee from walking into something- also in the freezer. I have a series of bruises on the inside of my right leg, just below my knee... I have no idea where they came from. Yesterday at work I hit my head on something. It hurt like a hurting thing, but I just kinda ignored it. Yesterday afternoon I was looking in the mirror and I thought, "Ew, there's something in my hair." It was BLOOD! I cut my head when I hit it and I didn't even know it.

Thankfully, I will be off work on Sunday. I just have to make it through tomorrow and then I have a day to rest.

Not Every Bakery Is Charm City Cakes!

Today a customer wanted a sculpted cake, which we don't do, and then rudely asked me what I was doing working in a bakery if I couldn't draw. I probably shouldn't have said it, but I told her that Ace of Cakes is not real life for most bakeries and that the people who purchased those cakes paid thousands of dollars. Maybe I should have also mentioned that the "decorators" on that show actually went to art school to learn to draw/sculpt/paint but I didn't. I did tell her that the one and only cake decorator I've ever personally met who could draw worked at one of our other stores and I was sure she'd be able to help her if she was set on having her picture drawn by hand but she still wouldn't get a sculpted cake. Not surprising to me, she decided that she didn't want to order from us because we couldn't give her exactly what she wanted.

I would love to learn to draw but I know I'd have to take a class as my past attempts to learn on my own did next to nothing to improve my skill. It may not help me, though, since drawing with icing is NOT the same as drawing with a pencil. I'd love to learn to paint and sculpt as well. Someday I will take a flower arranging class. All of these things will help me with my cake decorating. Unfortunately, at this time I just don't have the money or the extra energy to devote to such things.

I'll be honest, with our current situation, someday seems very far away. I think about all the things that need to happen for me to progress professionally and for us to progress as a couple and for Branden to progress professionally... And I hope that we progress personally somewhere in there. It's a little overwhelming. I just keep telling myself that things are going to get better. Things are going to improve, we will be able to progress and someday I might actually be the decorator/pastry chef I wish to be.