Branden's Dad Is In The Hospital

Branden's step-dad had a stroke last night. I don't know the whole story but I do know that he was in Iowa and either he was at a truck stop or he made it to a truck stop before things got too bad. He was taken to the hospital in an ambulance and he currently believes the year to be 1945. Also, even if he fully recovers, he probably won't be allowed to drive truck anymore.

Branden is on his way to Iowa right now. I had to talk him in to going because I'm very-not-good at driving his truck but it uses so much more gas than my car that he feels we wouldn't have been able to afford his taking the truck. I told him that I had $300 in savings and I was more than willing to take it out and hand it to him for gas money and if he wouldn't accept that I would get up SUPER early tomorrow and drive his truck VERY SLOWLY to my work. After he went driving with me the first time he decided there was NO chance he was going but I begged and cried a lot and he agreed to show me the best way to drive the truck and let me try again. I did better the second time so he felt he could go ahead and leave. In a way, it's good that he doesn't have a job yet because that was one less thing he needed to worry about.

I'll admit right now that I don't really know if I'll be able to drive that truck to work tomorrow, but I don't have any choice except to try. Worse than that, I feel SO alone right now. I want him there, and I know his mom needs him there, but he's pretty much the only friend I have out here. We don't know how long he'll be gone but the earliest he may come back is tomorrow. There is this selfish, desperate part of me that wishes I could have just let him say I am too bad at driving the truck and then left him alone so he'd still be here now... But nobody, including myself, would have been able to forgive me if Branden didn't go and his dad got worse or something.

So I practically forced him to go. I will be TERRIBLY lonely and worry about him constantly and cry a lot but I won't hate myself later or be to blame for his not being where he needs to be. I did what I had to do. I just hope everything works out ok.